1:46 a.m.
The "Husband" ringtone went off. I was in a deep sleep and it didn't occur to me what the time was. I looked and saw that Scott was actually calling. It wasn't a FT call either. (same tone for both calls and FT) First thought was, "He's really delayed if he's actually CALLING from Germany again"...
When I answered, Scott said, "Hey, sorry to wake you, but I wanted to let you know we just landed at Andrews in DC." Whoa, what?
Apparently they flew out late in the evening in Germany. He didn't even have a chance to let me know they were leaving!
I slept better after that call than I have in several days, as I'm sure you can imagine!
When 6:30 a.m. came, he texted to say he was taking a shower. After that, he called on FT. He said he was at Ft. Belvoir instead of Walter Reed, and was seeing the retinal specialist at 8:30...then he had other appointments in the afternoon.
I took the kids to school and went on with my daily routine, happier to know he had actually made it to the U.S. finally! Headed to the church to do my volunteer stuff, setting up the orchestra for rehearsal, etc.
He called again around 11 or so. Told me that he had NOT actually seen the retinal specialist, just a regular ophthalmologist who ran the same tests. The retinal specialist "conferred" on the exam, and both came to the same conclusion/diagnosis as before. They told him he would have 3 weeks of convalescence leave and then another follow-up appointment. This left us wondering...WHERE?
I told him to advocate for his healthcare...if he didn't stand up for himself, they would do what was easiest for them.
Later, he called me, after having his appointment with his PCM. Seems that when you're assigned to a WTU, you're THERE...but you do have the option to sign yourself out. Except...no one had ever requested that. Basically, when you're in the WTU, all you do is go to your appointments. You go to formations for accountability, then you're free to do whatever you want till your next appointment! Uh...wow. Scott got the PCM, a retired LTC, to agree that he could go back to full duty, with a profile. The wheels were turning now. He was being reassigned back to his command at Ft. Campbell!!! This was the best case scenario. If he was in a WTU, he wouldn't be in command of the 101st. Better for him, and since he can STILL do his daily duties in a non-war environment, he's good to go.
Talk was of flying him straight to Campbell, but he talked them into letting him rent a car. He's heading HOME!!!! His commander at 101st HHB gave him a week of leave to come home, get his car, and get his affairs in order.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
12FEB13
So, now it's Tuesday, and Scott is still in Germany. Delayed yet again. We've Skyped several times today, but there's nothing new, really. They are not giving him any answers regarding exactly WHEN they'll ship him. Meanwhile, they are still on lock-down, unable to leave the airport at all. Yes, they can go to the USO, watch TV, use the computers, etc...and sleep in the cots...but all these delays.
Now of course, there's no way he'll see a doc on Wednesday. I had hoped that IF he had to stay stateside, he would be released to come home in time for the weekend. Still praying for miraculous healing, and if not, for the doc to say he can go back downrange.
Sounds silly, doesn't it? For a wife to pray that her husband will go back into a dangerous territory...to war...
But you need to go back and read my first post. This has been what Scott has planned for and wanted for a LONG time. No, I DON'T want to be separated from my husband anymore. NO, I don't want him in harm's way, in danger. But I do want him to succeed in what he has set as a goal. Too many times, he has had his hopes dashed. This was the one sure thing. And it's not so sure anymore.
But see, here's the thing. He's still part of the 101st. So...if he's cleared for light duty, he'll likely have to go back to Ft. Campbell. Do I want THAT? Heck no. But if it will enable him to deploy as soon as his eye heals, then that's what we'll need to do. We'll take advantage of his being stateside and go visit like we'd done before deployment. And then, his eye will heal, he'll be cleared to go, and he'll go and accomplish what he set out to do. I am an Army Wife...I am resilient, I can handle this. Military Families go through this and so much more.
I don't even want to think about what else could happen. Scott's worn out. He's feeling down. And sometimes he wants to give up. He's got 20 years in, he can retire. But I know he's not ready to do that yet, even if he feels defeated and thinks it best. But in the end, I'm praying for God's will in all of this, as I have been doing since the crazy deployment began.
It's only 4:40 p.m. here, so I don't know if I'll hear back from Scott tonight or not. I'm hoping I will soon, but if not, I'm sure I'll hear something tomorrow. If I get any updates about his flight, I'll post again.
ILY24752
Now of course, there's no way he'll see a doc on Wednesday. I had hoped that IF he had to stay stateside, he would be released to come home in time for the weekend. Still praying for miraculous healing, and if not, for the doc to say he can go back downrange.
Sounds silly, doesn't it? For a wife to pray that her husband will go back into a dangerous territory...to war...
But you need to go back and read my first post. This has been what Scott has planned for and wanted for a LONG time. No, I DON'T want to be separated from my husband anymore. NO, I don't want him in harm's way, in danger. But I do want him to succeed in what he has set as a goal. Too many times, he has had his hopes dashed. This was the one sure thing. And it's not so sure anymore.
But see, here's the thing. He's still part of the 101st. So...if he's cleared for light duty, he'll likely have to go back to Ft. Campbell. Do I want THAT? Heck no. But if it will enable him to deploy as soon as his eye heals, then that's what we'll need to do. We'll take advantage of his being stateside and go visit like we'd done before deployment. And then, his eye will heal, he'll be cleared to go, and he'll go and accomplish what he set out to do. I am an Army Wife...I am resilient, I can handle this. Military Families go through this and so much more.
I don't even want to think about what else could happen. Scott's worn out. He's feeling down. And sometimes he wants to give up. He's got 20 years in, he can retire. But I know he's not ready to do that yet, even if he feels defeated and thinks it best. But in the end, I'm praying for God's will in all of this, as I have been doing since the crazy deployment began.
It's only 4:40 p.m. here, so I don't know if I'll hear back from Scott tonight or not. I'm hoping I will soon, but if not, I'm sure I'll hear something tomorrow. If I get any updates about his flight, I'll post again.
ILY24752
11FEB13
Scott's flight was delayed. He was supposed to fly out at 1:00 p.m. (7:00 a.m. EST), but now has been pushed back to 7:00 p.m. They are supposed to get into Andrews (based on flight time, it would be around 7 or 8 p.m. EST), they'll be picked up and brought to Walter Reed, given housing, and we'll know from there. Scott is hoping to get in to see the doctor on Wednesday sometime. Still praying for a miraculous healing, and if not, for the doc to say yeah, go back downrange, it'll heal.
As for me, seems like I did a bunch of nothing all day. Worrying, praying, crying....
I did manage to get the laundry going, and went out to get a new backpack for Hannah. That's about it.
ILY24752
As for me, seems like I did a bunch of nothing all day. Worrying, praying, crying....
I did manage to get the laundry going, and went out to get a new backpack for Hannah. That's about it.
ILY24752
10FEB13
2:24 a.m. Text tone...ugh, I'm tired. Not sleeping well and worried...
There are a lot of concerns right now. The talk is that he'll got to Walter Reed/Bethesda for the specialist. He wants to come home...or to Ft. Gordon. He DEFINITELY doesn't want to go to Ft. Campbell (there's nothing there...no home, no car!). We have to be realistic about what may happen. He is STILL assigned to the 101st, so unless he gets convalescent leave, he may be sent back there. All the unknowns will be filled in as we go.
Ideally, he can come here for his care and convalescence. Better yet, they can just tell him that since there's nothing they can do, he can go back downrange. Seriously. He CAN see out of the eye...it's just not clear. I don't know about anyone else, but I know that even with BLURRY VISION, I can shoot a target. It may not be dead center, but I'll hit the target. The likelihood of him even having to shoot at all is slim, so I don't see why they can't sent him back. There are issues with who will take leadership if can't go back. I won't get into it here.
Scott has worked hard for this. We've been separated for 16 months in order for him to be in a deploying unit. I don't want him to give up, and he definitely doesn't want to NOT be deployed.
Went back to sleep after our text conversation, but again, I had a hard time sleeping and so many dreams...not many were good, either. Lots of prayers running through my head all the time. Praying for miracles right now.
10:15 a.m.
FT with Scott, at church (thankful for the wifi there!). He said that he was going to push to be sent back downrange.
All the rest of this day, we went back and forth. He was told that he wouldn't be able to go back downrange. He was manifested on a med-evac flight to leave Monday at 7:00 a.m. (Germany time). They came to get him around 5:30 p.m. He was going to have to spend the night at Ramstein, but they had beds available.
While he was at the airport, he was able to go to the USO. No wifi, but they had skype loaded, so we skyped for a while. He's still waiting to go.
ILY24752
There are a lot of concerns right now. The talk is that he'll got to Walter Reed/Bethesda for the specialist. He wants to come home...or to Ft. Gordon. He DEFINITELY doesn't want to go to Ft. Campbell (there's nothing there...no home, no car!). We have to be realistic about what may happen. He is STILL assigned to the 101st, so unless he gets convalescent leave, he may be sent back there. All the unknowns will be filled in as we go.
Ideally, he can come here for his care and convalescence. Better yet, they can just tell him that since there's nothing they can do, he can go back downrange. Seriously. He CAN see out of the eye...it's just not clear. I don't know about anyone else, but I know that even with BLURRY VISION, I can shoot a target. It may not be dead center, but I'll hit the target. The likelihood of him even having to shoot at all is slim, so I don't see why they can't sent him back. There are issues with who will take leadership if can't go back. I won't get into it here.
Scott has worked hard for this. We've been separated for 16 months in order for him to be in a deploying unit. I don't want him to give up, and he definitely doesn't want to NOT be deployed.
Went back to sleep after our text conversation, but again, I had a hard time sleeping and so many dreams...not many were good, either. Lots of prayers running through my head all the time. Praying for miracles right now.
10:15 a.m.
FT with Scott, at church (thankful for the wifi there!). He said that he was going to push to be sent back downrange.
All the rest of this day, we went back and forth. He was told that he wouldn't be able to go back downrange. He was manifested on a med-evac flight to leave Monday at 7:00 a.m. (Germany time). They came to get him around 5:30 p.m. He was going to have to spend the night at Ramstein, but they had beds available.
While he was at the airport, he was able to go to the USO. No wifi, but they had skype loaded, so we skyped for a while. He's still waiting to go.
ILY24752
9FEB13
Woke early...for CST, anyway...I was still in my timezone. I just dozed and hoped I'd hear from Scott. After taking a shower, I sat with Niki for a bit, but then decided to head out. I had 8 hours of driving time ahead of me, and left Clarksville around 8:15 a.m. I stopped for coffee and donuts (Dunkin' Donuts!), then hit the road.
I checked my phone periodically...saw a text had come in around 10 a.m. Darn, I missed it!!! I was just west of Nickajack lake/dam (outside Chattanooga) when my phone rang and it was Scott. He was calling from Germany...wanted me to find a wifi hotspot asap. As soon as I could, I pulled off to a McD's...but for some reason, the FT wasn't going through, neither were texts. That meant he wasn't on his end.
I got back on the highway and drove again. My messages got thru, because he texted back to tell me to try again. I did, once I crossed into Georgia. STILL no luck. I called him instead. We'll pay for the call.
Well, the news wasn't the best. He'd seen a doctor (even though we thought he wouldn't see anyone till Monday, apparently if it's "life, limb, or eyesight" you can be seen right away. So on Saturday a.m. he had been seen. The doc there told him pretty much the same thing...added a few terms: Acute Central Serous Chorioretinopathy with Epithelial Detachment. The full explanation: The layers of the iris have separated, and this tear is allowing fluid, which contains pigment from the iris, to leak into his retina, causing a blurry/distorted vision in the eye. It's common in men 20-50 years old...in Type-A personalities (never considered Scott a Type-A!)...there are other contributing factors which Scott has as well, unfortunately. There's no cure, no medicine, no surgery to fix this, but it will heal on its own...in 2-6 months. OUCH.
The decision was made to send him to the states to see a retinal specialist to see if anything else can be done. Now we wait to find out where he will go, and what happens after that.
I checked my phone periodically...saw a text had come in around 10 a.m. Darn, I missed it!!! I was just west of Nickajack lake/dam (outside Chattanooga) when my phone rang and it was Scott. He was calling from Germany...wanted me to find a wifi hotspot asap. As soon as I could, I pulled off to a McD's...but for some reason, the FT wasn't going through, neither were texts. That meant he wasn't on his end.
I got back on the highway and drove again. My messages got thru, because he texted back to tell me to try again. I did, once I crossed into Georgia. STILL no luck. I called him instead. We'll pay for the call.
Well, the news wasn't the best. He'd seen a doctor (even though we thought he wouldn't see anyone till Monday, apparently if it's "life, limb, or eyesight" you can be seen right away. So on Saturday a.m. he had been seen. The doc there told him pretty much the same thing...added a few terms: Acute Central Serous Chorioretinopathy with Epithelial Detachment. The full explanation: The layers of the iris have separated, and this tear is allowing fluid, which contains pigment from the iris, to leak into his retina, causing a blurry/distorted vision in the eye. It's common in men 20-50 years old...in Type-A personalities (never considered Scott a Type-A!)...there are other contributing factors which Scott has as well, unfortunately. There's no cure, no medicine, no surgery to fix this, but it will heal on its own...in 2-6 months. OUCH.
The decision was made to send him to the states to see a retinal specialist to see if anything else can be done. Now we wait to find out where he will go, and what happens after that.
8FEB13
Okay...so yesterday's vague post is due to a lot of unexpected events that began on this day.
2:22 a.m. I hear my text tone go off. That means that Scott is in a wifi area, since I don't technically have texting on my phone, but iMessage. Since Scott brought his iPhone with him, we can use iMessage as long as he is in a wifi area.
He told me he had arrived in Afghanistan, had been assigned a B-hut (quarters, if you want to call them that) and had gotten his wifi/internet going. I was mostly asleep, though sleep has been really hard to come by, with all the deployment nerves and emotions. He told me it was noon there, and he had some stuff to take care of...I hoped to FaceTime (from this point forward, I will refer to this as FT) around the kids' wake-up time. I went back to sleep, knowing he'd finally made it to where he's been trying to be for all this time. It's finally happening. Scott expressed his feelings about actually coming into Afghanistan in full "battle rattle". I can't even begin to imagine.
6:20 a.m.
My FT tone rings...it's Scott. Yes! He was able to finish what he needed to do so that he could talk with us. I get the kids up and we chat. The kids head up to get dressed...then Scott tells me some very unexpected news. While flying on Tuesday evening, he had been sleeping...when he woke he noticed his vision was blurry in his right eye. He attributed it to lack of sleep. (because how well can you really sleep on planes, wearing military uniforms and crammed in with so many others???) It didn't seem to go away, even after landing in Manas. When he got to Afghanistan, he went to see a doctor.
Central Serous Retinopathy. It means, loosely, that there's a tear in his eye and it's causing fluid to leak into his retina, causing the blurred vision.
When he called, he was packing up his gear to be medi-vac'd to Landstuhl. Where he had JUST been a few days ago...the ophthalmologist at BAF was confident that he'd return in no time. That was all I knew.
Of course, I had a plane ticket to fly to Nashville and head to Clarksville to pick up Scott's car. Should I go, I asked? Scott told me to get his car, that he was sure he'd be back at BAF soon. So...I did.
I got the kids off to school...made sure everything was taken care of in the house (had already arranged for the kids to stay at friends' houses for the night and all day Saturday). I went to lunch with a friend, and while there, I got a call from Scott's commander. He wanted to know what I knew and if I needed anything, to let them know. Of course, he himself is headed out soon, so I wouldn't have access to him for too long. Ugh. Of course, I was texting with Scott by then. He hadn't flown out yet, so he was checking on me.
My friend dropped me off at the Columbia Airport. I boarded without issue, having a great seat (bulkhead, aisle!). Got to Charlotte for my connection, and we landed 15 minutes early. Never had THAT happen before! As I landed, Scott texted again. He was now at the hospital, waiting to go to the plane to head to Landstuhl. We texted back and forth, I think to keep our minds off everything. Once again, I had a decent seat from Charlotte to Nashville...exit row. No seat next to me!
When I landed, I let him know I was there...I was waiting for my friend Niki to pick me up. She got me, brought me to her house, and we went out to eat sushi. I worried and worried about when he would get to Germany. Not much I could do. After we ate, we headed back to her house. Both of us crashed early.
ILY24752
2:22 a.m. I hear my text tone go off. That means that Scott is in a wifi area, since I don't technically have texting on my phone, but iMessage. Since Scott brought his iPhone with him, we can use iMessage as long as he is in a wifi area.
He told me he had arrived in Afghanistan, had been assigned a B-hut (quarters, if you want to call them that) and had gotten his wifi/internet going. I was mostly asleep, though sleep has been really hard to come by, with all the deployment nerves and emotions. He told me it was noon there, and he had some stuff to take care of...I hoped to FaceTime (from this point forward, I will refer to this as FT) around the kids' wake-up time. I went back to sleep, knowing he'd finally made it to where he's been trying to be for all this time. It's finally happening. Scott expressed his feelings about actually coming into Afghanistan in full "battle rattle". I can't even begin to imagine.
6:20 a.m.
My FT tone rings...it's Scott. Yes! He was able to finish what he needed to do so that he could talk with us. I get the kids up and we chat. The kids head up to get dressed...then Scott tells me some very unexpected news. While flying on Tuesday evening, he had been sleeping...when he woke he noticed his vision was blurry in his right eye. He attributed it to lack of sleep. (because how well can you really sleep on planes, wearing military uniforms and crammed in with so many others???) It didn't seem to go away, even after landing in Manas. When he got to Afghanistan, he went to see a doctor.
Central Serous Retinopathy. It means, loosely, that there's a tear in his eye and it's causing fluid to leak into his retina, causing the blurred vision.
When he called, he was packing up his gear to be medi-vac'd to Landstuhl. Where he had JUST been a few days ago...the ophthalmologist at BAF was confident that he'd return in no time. That was all I knew.
Of course, I had a plane ticket to fly to Nashville and head to Clarksville to pick up Scott's car. Should I go, I asked? Scott told me to get his car, that he was sure he'd be back at BAF soon. So...I did.
I got the kids off to school...made sure everything was taken care of in the house (had already arranged for the kids to stay at friends' houses for the night and all day Saturday). I went to lunch with a friend, and while there, I got a call from Scott's commander. He wanted to know what I knew and if I needed anything, to let them know. Of course, he himself is headed out soon, so I wouldn't have access to him for too long. Ugh. Of course, I was texting with Scott by then. He hadn't flown out yet, so he was checking on me.
My friend dropped me off at the Columbia Airport. I boarded without issue, having a great seat (bulkhead, aisle!). Got to Charlotte for my connection, and we landed 15 minutes early. Never had THAT happen before! As I landed, Scott texted again. He was now at the hospital, waiting to go to the plane to head to Landstuhl. We texted back and forth, I think to keep our minds off everything. Once again, I had a decent seat from Charlotte to Nashville...exit row. No seat next to me!
When I landed, I let him know I was there...I was waiting for my friend Niki to pick me up. She got me, brought me to her house, and we went out to eat sushi. I worried and worried about when he would get to Germany. Not much I could do. After we ate, we headed back to her house. Both of us crashed early.
ILY24752
Monday, February 11, 2013
Sigh...
I'd hoped to keep this blog up, but as luck would have it, life has been too stressful to continue anything right now.
The deployment situation has changed, and as such, until I can tell more, I won't post here.
The deployment situation has changed, and as such, until I can tell more, I won't post here.
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